Posted by Dinah on December 28, 2004, at 21:10:56
In reply to Re: What do all these Ts actually look like? » Dinah, posted by daisym on December 28, 2004, at 19:54:01
That's an easy one. We have goodbye rituals. After every session he tells me I can call him if I need to. Sometimes it's clearly rote and we sort of grin. But sometimes he says it like he means it, and it makes me feel safe. In either case I like it, and it really upsets me if he leaves it out. So much that I usually remind him by asking and the one time we both forgot I went back from halfway down the hall and knocked forlornly at his door.
But my very very very favorite thing is that I ask after a rough session if everything will be ok. And if it was rough enough that he doesn't feel it's a good moment to remind me of my responsibility to make sure everything is ok, he'll answer "Yes, everything is going to be ok." in the most certain and reassuring tone. If he gets the tone wrong, it just makes things worse than if he said nothing at all. Sometimes he doesn't wait for me to ask, but offers it.
Yes, I'm no better than a two year old in my need of rituals. I find them inordinately stabilizing.
poster:Dinah
thread:434977
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041228/msgs/435241.html