Posted by antigua on April 26, 2004, at 8:47:36
In reply to Not being understood, posted by fallsfall on April 22, 2004, at 20:02:29
I don't think I really have anything new to add here, but I can relate to that feeling of not knowing what your T wants, especially a T that you've worked with, like and are compatible with. Sometimes I'll look at my T and not have a clue of what she's talking about. After 13 years, she can still bring up comments that are totally foreign to me. And it's more than my dysfunctional thinking. Honestly, sometimes I just give up and tell her I just don't get it and we put it aside until we can find a better way to communicate the issue.
Please try not to feel like you're doing it "wrong." You are who you are, and if your T doesn't get it, then maybe you need to keep on expaining. I can spend the whole hour trying to explain my feelings and my T still doesn't get it. I had another T (disastrous) for a while last year and I just didn't understand a word he said. He would tell me to quit intellectualizing, but since that's the only way I know how to be I still don't understand. I, too, feel much more comfortable when I've figured it out before I bring it up. Maybe it's just a matter of trust; I really don't trust ANYONE to open up the wounds in their presence. But that doesn't mean I'm doing therapy wrong, I refuse to believe it.
You sound like you know it's transference. Good luck, that means you have something to work with.
Best,
antigua
poster:antigua
thread:338953
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040426/msgs/340121.html