Posted by luvinmomofone1 on May 6, 2008, at 15:23:20
my son is almost 18 and all we do is fight and fight , i have a mental disablity and he has depression and we are both on meds but he dropped out of school got his ged..with high grades i might add and is working full time at fast food. waiting to turn 18 so he can get a better job that pays more and has benefits. he wants out on his own but cannot afford it at this time and i want him out cause i am tired of fighting all the time. hes my son and my best friend, hes my only child and we have always been very very close. that closeness has turned to codependency mostly on my part and its part of the reason we fight i think. i dont want him ot leave and i dont wanna be alone . i know hes gotta be a man and get out on his own but i cant stand thinking about it...it hurts so much i cry everytime i think about it. i am trying to cut those invisible apron strings but i am not doign a good job. last fight we got into i got so enraged i punched him in the jaw. i felt so ashamed afterwards cause i am a survivor and now i feel like an abuser which i NEVER want to be. it seems like the fights escalate more and more everytime we fight. sometimes i feel like i am getting out of control and i dont like that. since last august i have dealt with losing someone very close to me to death and losing my father to a disownment on his part, a car accident, a lousy and hatefull, stressful trip to see my dad before the disownment and now this fighting with my son. in a way i will be glad to be alone but i am afraid to be lonely. sorry for the ramble.. i dont mean to rant
poster:luvinmomofone1
thread:827540
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/child/20070211/msgs/827540.html