Posted by Sulpicia on February 7, 2001, at 16:00:51
In reply to Worried about friend's daughter, posted by Gracie2 on January 26, 2001, at 0:56:30
Hi Gracie --
Sounds like several things going on at once! Your newly married friend may be acting a bit zealously about her new role as step-mom. Perhaps the possibility of a psychiatric disorder, and so not amenable to her sense of herself as fabulous wife and mother is causing a bit of denial?
As to the face picking, take my personal experience for what you will. My daughter has bipolar II disorder; when she gets really stressed or more depressed, she picks on her face. To the point of scarring. Her pdoc mentioned it to me and said it was a flare-up of OCD [obsessive compulsive disorder] and came from stress that she couldn't figure out how to relieve in any other way.
I'm not saying that this is the case with your friend's child. It might be that the picking is related to stress.It seems to me that all kids should be evaluated by a therapist during and after a divorce. This child would certainly benefit from an evaluation.
The face picking is problematic and should be stopped ASAP. Not only will it become a habit that's difficult to break, it can easily cause scarring, and the blood and scabs will make her peers tease her -- then she'll feel even worse, and possibly pick more.
If these kids were in an abusive situation prior to the remarriage, it's all the more reason that a therapist should be involved. Love goes a long way but it doesn't cure psycho-pathology.
It may come down to figuring out how to get around your friend's ego involvement in this situation [tact, lies, whatever it takes] so this child can get the help she needs.
Good luck,
S.
poster:Sulpicia
thread:67
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/child/20000813/msgs/97.html