Posted by noa on December 16, 2003, at 19:37:19
In reply to A Suicide in an Online Peer Support Group, posted by Dr. Bob on December 16, 2003, at 17:58:57
Interesting.
I thought there should be more in there about the process of figuring out how to verify the credibility of the person who informed us and that the announcement was true.
Also, it would be good to include more excerpts from posts about recent controversial suicidal claims (for want of a better word) and their effect on people because of SAR's death.
I think the guilt feelings factor is coming up for me now as I remember SAR and the news of her death, because I felt that she did post reports of suicidal feelings that came and went and this brings up the question of how can we know? She would post about a suicide attempt one moment and then be joking and cheerful the next.
Also, there were her reports of some behaviors that put herself seriously in harm's way. I remember feeling so worried about some of the choices she made and the risks she took. And I guess somehow I felt guilty because she was doing these potentially self-destructive things that maybe should have signalled an alarm. Maybe I feel guilty because at the time, I remember being so scared for her when she talked about her close calls (with suicide, with other dangers) and my scared feelings may have also made me feel angry at her for putting herself at risk, because I liked her and wanted to be able to help her be safer, but couldn't and so my fear led to anger and then when she committed suicide, maybe I felt guilty because of my anger.
I still have a hard time reading posts that come close to the edge. It is still painful for me.
poster:noa
thread:290698
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20031120/msgs/290737.html