Posted by NewQuestions on February 5, 2009, at 17:08:08
In reply to Re: Long Term SSRI Use Has Destabilzed Me » NewQuestions, posted by SLS on February 5, 2009, at 13:52:29
Winter 1994: start Zoloft, work up to 200mg, no atypical side effects
August 2002: Zoloft side effects change dramatically--more lethargic, less muscle energy, brain fog, confusion, heaviness, mentally lazy, nonrestful sleep, more withdrawn, physically grooming worsens. It was still "working" on my depression but the side effects were overwhelming. What was the cause? Is this poop out or something else?
Winter 2003: wean off zoloft and onto Lexapro--very difficult--seem to experience withdrawal effects from zoloft and SSRI side effects from Lexapro at same time--confusion, muscle energy, fogginess
Winter 2004: I finally got off zoloft, and some of the heaviness and confusion was gone. However, still experiencing similar side effects on Lexapro. Tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg of Lexapro and experience new clarity and energy. However, experienced withdrawal--nausea, lack of energy and anxieties come back. So I stayed on 10 mg of Lexapro and tried Cymbalta. Very energizing but caused anxiety. Wellibutrin and TCA's caused hypomania.
Next, tried Remeron which made me feel better, smarter, more cognitive energy, relieved the inner-tension but it made me incrediably tired during the day. I tried prozac (small dose) and for the first 4 weeks, it was great. It stimulated me and gave me cognitive energy. However, it suddenly sent me into a suicidal depression, which didn't go away until over a month later, i.e., when the prozac with its long half life exited my body. Yes, it was the drug, it was not environmental.
In September 2006, tried remeron again and it gave me a numbing depression. (Same drug different effect--did the prozac adverse reaction change me?) All of the benzos gave me a similar numbing depression (except Ativan). Then I tried effexor. Effective against depression but was hypersentitive to it. It caused jitterines, lack of inner well-being, some cognitive impairment. Worsened anxiety. Started to take Ativan regular to conteract jitteriness.
In November 2007, I stopped effexor. This was the first time I was off a sertonin boosting drug in 12 years. After a couple of months, I got depressed with feelings of hopelessness. I was also more obsessive, including sexually and extremely nervous. Tried a small dose of Lamictal and it seemed to help a little.
In April 2008, I tried stablon. It did not work and may make me worse.
In June 2008, I increased lamictal but it caused major cognitive impairment. Not only could I not finish sentences, but I couldn't even think. People thought I had ADD. In retrospect, the cognitive impairment maybe a delayed withdrawal symptom, due to lack of a sertonin drug (last dose in November of 2007) and not from the lamictal.
In July 2008, weaned off lamictal and start taking MAOI Parnate. Parnate helped with the depression, but the side effects were overwhelming including blurry vision, weakness, dry mouth, spiders crawling on skin, swollen ankles, insomnia, day time sleepiness, drugged feeling, apathetic, confusion, memory and learning impairment and extreme irritability. My guess at the time was the confusion was caused by the norepinhperine.
I went down to 1 pill (10 mg?) around the middle of November and immediately felt better. Then I tried a small dose of Adderall. I felt an adrenaline boost and I had more energy including cognitive energy. However, the adrenaline boost wore off and I felt the same confusion I felt on a higher dose Parnate.
Since reducing Parnate, noticed sexual obssession. Read online that some people who take Parnate experience sexual obsessions.
Last dose of Parnate was on December 18, 2008.
In January, 2009, I tried small dose of Inostiol--helped with obsessiveness but made me more depressed, especially in morning; tried small dose of 5-HTP--saw immediate improvement in skin and hair (retained oils), and helped with obsessiveness and anxiety, but made me depressed. Bad reactions to small doses of magnesium and choline too.
I am now off of everything except 1 mg Ativan.
Current symptoms:
Derealisation and depersonalisation (for 2 or 3 years)
irritability (last couple of years)
Vision problems, foggy vision, focus problems (more recent)
Cognitive problems, foggy brain, memory and concentration problems, inability to learn or think abstractly (memory, inability to learn and abstract reasoning within last year)
sexual obsessions (recent)
Muscle weakness, fatigue, low stamina (had this since Zoloft pooped out)
Apathy, lack of emotions (had this since Zoloft pooped out)
Sticky skin, waxy hair, skin rashes (had this since Zoloft pooped out)
Horrible sensations like heavy head, head pressures (more recent)
can't handle stress, racing thoughts (2 or 3 years)
Worse anxiety and depression than pre-ADs--its a physical anxiety (last year)
Dizziness in different ways, vertical and horizontal; major internal restlessness (2 or 3 years)
Inability to enjoy everyday things, including music, movies, etc (2 or 3 years)
personality change (gradually changed)I am extremely hypersensitive to sound, drugs, amino acids and B vitamins. Arguably, the hypersenitivity started when zoloft pooped out.
The only thing I take is 1 mg Ativan. The confusion and cognitive issues could a side effect of the Ativan but they are so extreme, I think they are related to the withdrawal.
WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?
poster:NewQuestions
thread:874312
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090203/msgs/878284.html