Posted by fleeting flutterby on August 9, 2008, at 14:39:22
In reply to Re: the truth an nothing but the truth first phillipa, posted by manic666 on August 9, 2008, at 4:01:41
> .but if your answer is yes, there is know twice as bad you have reached in hell as far as you can go.<<
--- this is how I've been feeling-- there is no "lower".... feel I'm at the bottom. my heart has been taken out and stomped on.(feel sick to my stomach, shakey most times, trouble sleeping... yuk...)---
>>the psychiatrist will know your at your edge<<
... yeah, I think they are sensing that with me.... feel if I have one more disappointment, I will implode-- literally.... even reaching out here takes more energy than I have most days.... just don't want to be pushed over the edge I'm teetering on.
argh. I'm that little runt that gets pushed away from mother's milk.... life is a constant competition in which I am that last runner coming up waaaaayyy in the back..... was youngest of 8-- how could I EVER win!!?!?? and plus I wasn't the "personality" that mother valued-- she hates sensitivity and insightfulness.... she has always pushed me away. Husband says one thing-- then does another..... argh! I'm .... I'm..... *rolls eyes*--- oh never mind, please don't bother with me..... I'm not anyone of any significance.....
>>how do i no, i was that man.<<
---- so, you made it back away from that edge..... wonder if you found inner strength or was it someone else that pulled you away......
flutterby-mandy
poster:fleeting flutterby
thread:844797
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20080805/msgs/845179.html