Posted by Spriggy on February 5, 2005, at 20:44:37
In reply to Re: meds for agitated depression?, posted by med_empowered on February 5, 2005, at 18:28:18
Thank you everyone.
A little more info for medempowered;
I have tried ( in my lifetime) Zoloft, Paxil, and Lexapro.
All are SSRi's, all wigged me out. I took the Zoloft 7 years while pregnant for "depression" that was circumstantial ( son just diagnosed with autism, moved across the country, etc..).
It left me feeling like a zombie with NO emotion.
Paxil made me feel bizarre as well.
Lexapro made me the worst I've ever been. I've never been suicidal in my life.. EVER.
However, after about 2 and a half weeks on Lexapro, I began feeling SOO weird in my head. Hard to explain but it was like I had cotton in my brain, couldn't stop racing thoughts, felt SOO bizarre and extremely uncomfortable, and experienced the DEEPEST, DARKEST, depression ever.
I had to fight every minute of the day to literally not just kill myself. If not for thinking of my children and what effect my suicide would have on them (and my husband) I would definitely be dead right now.
It was some SERIOUS irrational thinking; even had a hallucination at one point.
I know this is not a typical reaction to something like Lexapro but when I saw the psych she said it "can" happen and told me she thought it was the medication.
I have tapered off and am now on day 6 with NO Lexapro. I am feeling better every passing day.
As a matter of fact, today I have felt almost totally normal and like "myself" all day long.
So I am now 100% convinced it was the Lexapro.
If I stay feeling this way, I won't need any medicine.
If I go back to the horrible depression, I know that I won't survive another go round with it and will have to get help.
SO.. I'm guessing I will need something other than an SSRI and a mood stabilizer.
My psych ruled out bipolar although my father (and his mother) are severely bipolar. My grandmother actually committed suicide 10 years ago because of her bipolar.
So it is a family history but I've never displayed any "mania" and up until this point, only have had brief times of depression but nothing life altering like this past episode.
I have concluded two things, Either:
1) I may be bipolar and just be mildly so and can function without meds regularlyOR
2) the medication induced some type of manic behavior (not a fun mania however) and I am not bipolar.
I will just have to wait this out and see how I feel I suppose.
poster:Spriggy
thread:453592
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050202/msgs/453782.html