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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Racer on August 14, 2006, at 21:39:34
I woke up yesterday with sore throat, nausea, aches, etc. Still feel yucky.
And I sat down in front of an exam that did not look at all familiar. Not much that looked like anything I had ever seen before. I get depressed when I'm sick anyway, but that just made it that much worse.
I'm pretty sure I won't have an A on the exam. I am currently hoping only that I did well enough to allow me to get an A in the class. I think I can miss 65 or so points, out of 200.
Of course, when I got home again, I could think of how to work out one of the problems. I did get the right answer to that problem, but I had no idea how to set up the equation. {sigh}
I really don't want this to be the time that I find out what happens if I don't get an A. I don't know that I can handle that right now.
Maybe school is too stressful for me.
Posted by Jost on August 17, 2006, at 13:17:30
In reply to Exam did NOT go well..., posted by Racer on August 14, 2006, at 21:39:34
Racer, how did you do on the exam? Did you get an A?
Do you have a final today (Thursday)?
Were you able to concentrate, and do the work you needed?
Jost
Posted by Racer on August 17, 2006, at 14:46:25
In reply to Re: Exam did NOT go well... » Racer, posted by Jost on August 17, 2006, at 13:17:30
You know, I kept forgetting that I did get an A. I truly didn't do nearly as well as I would have liked, but it still squeaked into the A range. I was ready to cry, and then my study buddy pointed out, "It's still an A!" Oh, yeah... I missed that part...
I think my perspective is kinda warped on this -- I'm so used to getting at least 90%, that I break that up into Aa, Ab, Ac, Ad, and Af, if that makes any sense? So, to me, it looked like a C, rather than an A...
But the real problem is that I've been sick all week, so not tracking real well. This morning I nearly threw up on my husband, just before I had to leave to take the final. (He got out of the way in time, I'm very relieved to say.)
Of course, let's talk psychopathology: I'm sick, no voice, throwing up, fever, aches, sore throat, etc. And I'm beating myself up because I'm afraid I'm using it as an excuse to do badly on the dang exam! lol Some days, I know I'm nuts...
Anyway, I made it through the final. I needed 272 out of a possible 320 points. I think I probably managed to pull that one off, although I'm truly not sure. There were a few things that I really didn't get, and by the time I got to the end of the exam, I was just out of it -- I caught myself turning pages over and over, with no idea what I was looking for! At that point, I went through one last time to make sure there was SOME answer for every problem, checked that I had checked most of the answers, tried one last time on the couple that were really giving me trouble, and then said something along the lines of "into thine hands I commend my final exam."
I'm trying now to remind myself, "There's nothing you can do about it now, so let it go. There's no point in worrying and wondering and trying to remember the questions in order to try to work them out now. Just Let It Go..." So far, partial luck on that one. Every time I catch myself trying to work out a problem, I stop and say that, and it works for a short time, then the routine starts again. S'OK, though -- baby steps.
Besides, there was one problem that really bites my back end, so that one I actually will work on in the next day or two. That might help a little to reduce my anxiety. (I've had trouble with the concept one every exam it's been on, so it's time to figure it out once and for all.)
Thanks for asking, Jost. Take care.
Posted by Jost on August 17, 2006, at 23:42:25
In reply to Thanks for asking... » Jost, posted by Racer on August 17, 2006, at 14:46:25
Racer, I'm glad you got an A. A couple of years from now, it'll be a full-fledged A, and you won't remember what shade it was. I know what you mean about categories of A's though.
Not that you got sick to have a good excuse for not getting 100% on the final--- bt, since you were sick at least you don't have to-- I see that as progress!
Plus it's good to work out the problem that was bothering you all summer-- that's probably the only reason exams are worthwhile-- they get you to focus on the stuff you don't know.
As far remembering all the problems-- if you need to-- what the heck-- there are worse things in life. On the other hand, there are probably more fun things to spend time on.
Like a nice relaxing massage.... ? Yiiiiii.eeeee...!!! (That's me, relaxing during a massage, btw.)
Knowing myself, I could imagine having a pretty miserable time of studying. Sounds like you did really well. :)
So rest, get some Vitamin C and try not to worry, for a few days, anyway. You deserve it!
Jost
Posted by Fallsfall on August 19, 2006, at 12:32:32
In reply to Thanks for asking... » Jost, posted by Racer on August 17, 2006, at 14:46:25
I was going to ask how it went on Psychological, but I figured I should look here, first. It sure stinks when you are feeling poorly on exam day.
But you pulled it through - even being sick.
With Math classes, if you get an A in the class, it means that you will have the background that you need for the next class. Not all of the skills get used in future classes - so just hope that the ones that were a little fuzzy are those that aren't so important later on.
Congrats on finishing another class!
Posted by Racer on August 20, 2006, at 14:47:33
In reply to Re: Thanks for asking... » Racer, posted by Fallsfall on August 19, 2006, at 12:32:32
I'm having pretty severe intermittent anxiety attacks about not getting an A. I know that I won't know for another week, and there's nothing I can do about it, but it's still coming up again and again for me.
Heck, last night I was wondering if I could retroactively withdraw and take it again, so that I could get my A!
I know I won't really be able to do that, but the anxiety is pretty awful. And if I don't -- which is a very real possibility at this point -- I'm not sure what's going to happen. I know everyone says it would be OK, and all -- but I don't know, and I think I'm going to be pretty devastated by it.
I hate this...
But thanks for the encouragement. (And this particular one has come up last semester and this one, so I think I had best learn it...)
Posted by Jost on August 20, 2006, at 17:48:57
In reply to Unfortunately... » Fallsfall, posted by Racer on August 20, 2006, at 14:47:33
Racer, don't forget--there's a very good chance you did get an A.
The anxiety is terrible, and it's going to be upsetting if you don't get it. I'm not saying you won't be upset.
Until it happens, it's important to work on believing that you did okay. Whatever okay is. Because you are okay. Period.
I know that A seems to mean you're okay, you're special, that you're entitled to respect, your place in the room, no one can look down on you, so many things.
On this one, I've really been there, done that.
I know I would feel awful if I got anything other than an A on a test. Which is why I;ve avoided taking tests ever since HS.
it's so crazy, though, the thing about grades, A's, being "smart," etc. "It" ('it' being whatever really does matter) is so not about A's. It's not about shining or being a quick study, or looking good to the teachers or other students. I mean, that's all good-- and worthwhile, in a certain way. But in the end, that's so porous, so thin.
Let me repeat: I think you probably did get an A.
But I'd like you to consider, for the future--not now-- the fact that A is an illusion. It means nothing.
Or it means that on a certain day, you knew some material-- or you didn't.
It means nothing about whether you have any ideas, or any imagination, a passion to invest yourself in some type of work--whatever work you personally find meaning in.
That, ultimately, is all that matters. The point where my life started-- even if it is a mess, truly, in lots of ways, and even if most of the work I've done ends up in the trash, which there's a good chance it will-- was when I realized that "talent," the approval, or special regard of teachers, or status, or any of that wasn't the point.
The point is what I cared about, what activity, or work, or thing, felt meaningful enough to me, for me to bother spending my time, my energy, on it. I really stopped caring much about whether anyone thought I had talent, or whether I was successful--not that being successful isn't a great thing, of course.
What I really value is the chance to do the work that I want to do. I could get a million A's-- or A+'s-- and so what?
I don't believe I'm second=rate. Or that you are. I don't care that much what anyone else thinks. I mean I do--but I don't. Not enough to let it ruin my life, anyway.
I think if you find the things you really need to do, that you really have a deep connection to-- you'll be okay. yeah-- you'll probably get A's-- but even if you don't, ultimately, you'll do something very worthwhile. Much more worthwhile than getting an A.
Jost
Posted by llrrrpp on August 24, 2006, at 23:21:45
In reply to Exam did NOT go well..., posted by Racer on August 14, 2006, at 21:39:34
Racer-
Sorry I wasn't keeping up with this board. I just wanted you to know that I'm sorry that you were feeling crappy.What if you were one of your babble friends. What if lurp said that she had taken a final, and she wanted an A so bad, and that she was sick, and now she's really upset because she didn't get the best grade possible?
What if you were the teacher, talking to a student who was so concerned about her not quite A-plus?
What if you were interviewing someone for a job, and she had gotten an A in one class and an A- in another?
Well, then don't be so hard on yourself. If you want to beat yourself up over something, I guess I should be happy that it's something like schoolwork, where at least you learn something. But seriously, this is not the purpose of school.
"The purpose of education is to teach young people how to think" (my h.s. US History teacher)
And if you can think, and you've learned, then don't sweat it. Racer, perhaps it might be therapeutic for you to take a class pass/fail. Seriously, don't think about it. Just enjoy the class. Don't get caught up in the inner competition with the voice inside. Send your inner critic on a semester abroad- somewhere like... Timbuktu. Let HER worry about Africa, and YOU worry about getting some learning done.
Congratulations, by the way, on VERY successful completion of your summer coursework.
yours,
-ll
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