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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 5 of 5. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Deneb on November 30, 2009, at 23:01:52
I've decided I don't want anything in life except a title. I want to be an M.D. or PhD. If I don't get one I'm going to kill myself. I want to be a somebody. I want to be important. I want to have influence and power. I want to make headlines when I die.
I think I've ruined my chances though. My grades are crap now. My only purpose in life is to succeed academically and I've ruined it.
I'm going to study as hard as I can and hope for the best. If I don't succeed I will kill myself as life is not worth living for me without a title.
I am nothing without a title, a nobody.
Posted by Deneb on December 1, 2009, at 0:35:25
In reply to I want a title soooo badly! **trigger**, posted by Deneb on November 30, 2009, at 23:01:52
I feel so hopeless about my life right now. I used to have so much potential. People thought I would make something of my life. I always got good grades.
Now I've ruined everything. I feel so depressed.
Who am I kidding? I will never be successful in school. I've ruined my grades. It's really competitive out there. No one wants a failure. That plus I am just plain lazy.
My dreams can't be realized. I will never be a distinguished chemist. First, I'm not smart enough and second, I am not hardworking enough.
I hope there is such a thing as reincarnation. Maybe I can start over again.
I'm so sad right now.
Posted by Deneb on December 1, 2009, at 13:02:46
In reply to Re: I want a title soooo badly! **trigger**, posted by Deneb on December 1, 2009, at 0:35:25
I don't know what came over me. I know I can be happy with or without a post grad degree.
I actually prefer not going to school. School is too stressful for me. I wish I could handle it, but I can't.
I'll be OK with a job that pays a little more than minimum wage.
I should aim for attainable goals and I am worth something even without degrees. I think I need a career counselor.
Posted by obsidian on December 3, 2009, at 9:33:01
In reply to Sorry, am OK again, posted by Deneb on December 1, 2009, at 13:02:46
denebster,
how are you? you are more than your grades you know...but I don't have to tell you that right??
you know about cognitive distortions??
you probably do, it's what came to mind when I read your posthttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_distortion
you're wonderful no matter what
be nice to yourself or I'll kick your *ss ;-)
-sid
Posted by inanimate peanut on December 13, 2009, at 12:23:56
In reply to Re: Sorry, am OK again » Deneb, posted by obsidian on December 3, 2009, at 9:33:01
It's hard to change something that you always thought you'd achieve. I always thought I'd get a law degree or a PhD and was well on that path until bipolar derailed it. It's not fair what the illness steals away. I'm not happy in my job and I so wish I could go back to school but am just not stable enough. I have to remind myself every day that I'm not a bad person just because I'm not going to be what I always expected to be (and neither are you). Maybe you'll get stable enough to earn your title after all.
This is the end of the thread.
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