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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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Posted by Kath on July 29, 2008, at 22:05:08
In reply to Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 21:41:22
Oh Sweetie,
It is so unbelievably disgusting!
I'm sure you hardly even get a chance to go to the bathroom, what with trying to get everything done, but are you able to be keeping track, etc to let HR know? Or even to make an email by "cut & pasting" what you write here (& obviously editing it!!! LOL)
I think it would be VERY good to let HR know what she'd now in the process of doing.
I'm glad you were able to speak to that co-worker. I'd let her know that you appreciate her support & I dunno - just something about that you are sorry if it feels very 1-sided with you venting, etc.
Remember all those anger-venting methods I told ya.
I went to an appointment today with a doctor who does some pretty off-the-wall alternative type stuff. One of the things I worked on (amounts to sitting & letting thoughts come in while holding certain energy points) & I was working on "I don't have any control" YOUR situation came up - & nope I don't have ANY control over it & BOY do I wish I did!!!!
((((((((you)))))))))
luv, Kath
PS - when this job is history, I think you might feel SUCH a sense of relief hun. I think you're going to be okay.
Posted by Larry Hoover on July 29, 2008, at 22:27:47
In reply to Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 21:41:22
Posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:33:35
In reply to Re: Worst day yet » TexasChic, posted by Kath on July 29, 2008, at 22:05:08
For some reason it just made me laugh to think of you thinking of me like that, I don't know why.
I guess I need to get it through my head that I AM in control of what happens next. Maybe not in what other people do, but how I handle it and where I go from there.
I think I am going to try to pursue the extended time off thing with a doctor's note that the HR lady sent me paper work on. My doc thinks they may fire me because of it, but hey, who's to say they aren't going to fire me tomorrow. Or if they don't, that I don't go totally postal before then!
-T
Posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:35:25
In reply to {{{{{{{{TC}}}}}}}} (nm) » TexasChic, posted by Larry Hoover on July 29, 2008, at 22:27:47
Posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:28:45
In reply to Re: Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:33:35
:-))
How long of exended time off could you get, do you think?
I'm wondering if it'd be legal for them to fire you either:
- for taking extended medical leave
or
- while you're ON extended medical leaveI also wonder how long the doctor would give you leave for?
Also, would you be in a bad situation if you got fired & hadn't got a job yet?
Just thoughts.
luv ya, Kath
Posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:31:04
In reply to Re: Worst day yet » Kath, posted by TexasChic on July 29, 2008, at 22:33:35
pretty clear to me!!!
I think she's definitely going ALL OUT to build a case to fire you on the grounds (ridiculous though they are) that you're incompetent.
What is your take on that lately?
xoxo Kath
Posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 19:23:50
In reply to PS - your boss's intentions seem » TexasChic, posted by Kath on July 30, 2008, at 11:31:04
I was hoping for a couple of weeks, but my doctor said I needed at least a month off! Its still not officially approved, but I was told by my doctor and the claims rep that I should call in tomorrow and tell my supervisor I won't be coming in and that I have filed an illness recover claim. Oh, and I also made sure with HR that this would not get me fired. She said my job would still be available when I got back.
-T
Posted by Phillipa on July 30, 2008, at 19:42:19
In reply to I am now on illness recovery time, posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 19:23:50
T and this gives you time to try and find another job? Love Phillipa
Posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 19:48:05
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time » TexasChic, posted by Phillipa on July 30, 2008, at 19:42:19
Yes, and I'll have time enough to recover so maybe I can do a decent interview!!!
I'm still kind of not believing it yet. I can't imagine not working for a month.
-T
Posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on July 30, 2008, at 21:13:49
In reply to I am now on illness recovery time, posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 19:23:50
> I was hoping for a couple of weeks, but my doctor said I needed at least a month off! Its still not officially approved, but I was told by my doctor and the claims rep that I should call in tomorrow and tell my supervisor I won't be coming in and that I have filed an illness recover claim. Oh, and I also made sure with HR that this would not get me fired. She said my job would still be available when I got back.
>
> -TI am sorry hun...((((((tc)))))...I haven't really said much. It's more of a case of I don't know what to say. I feel your pain, as I've been in similar job situations, and I felt like my Human Rights, my God Given Right to exist where violated by a f***ing employer/co-worker. You deserve so much better, and I wish I could help. It's the 'way of the world' out there today. They have created an economy that unless you are born into the super-rich, you have to be a slave to the work-grind. And they keep taking more and more from us, so soon we will have just a few very, very rich people and all the rest of us will be working-class peasants. I thought you might able to relate to these words:
As soon as youre born they make you feel small
By giving you no time instead of it all
Till the pain is so big you feel nothing at all
They hurt you at home and they hit you at school
They hate you if youre clever and they despise a fool
Till youre so f*ck*ng crazy you cant follow their rulesWhen theyve tortured and scared you for twenty odd years
Then they expect you to pick a career
When you cant really function youre so full of fear
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to beKeep you doped with religion and sex and tv
And you think youre so clever and classless and free
But youre still f*ck*ng peasants as far as I can see
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to beTheres room at the top they are telling you still
But first you must learn how to smile as you kill
If you want to be like the folks on the hill
A working class hero is something to be
A working class hero is something to beBIG HUGS...
Jay :)
Posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 21:49:10
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time » TexasChic, posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on July 30, 2008, at 21:13:49
> . It's the 'way of the world' out there today. They have created an economy that unless you are born into the super-rich, you have to be a slave to the work-grind. And they keep taking more and more from us, so soon we will have just a few very, very rich people and all the rest of us will be working-class peasants.
That is so true! Its despicable that minimum wage is not enough for ANYONE to live on. At all. Period.
Today I took a wrong turn and ended up in a really, really well to do neighborhood. I've seen nice houses, but DAMN! I kept just stopping my car in the middle of the road staring. These places were just SO ELEGANT! Now I've driven through the unimaginably big mansion neighborhoods to look at xmas lights and stuff, but the fact that these weren't quite that big, but still so WOW, just gave me such a weird feeling. So many people live like this and don't know anything different! And the worst of it is, these people are probably only considered upper middle class!
Thanks for your kind words. This is actually a good thing. Now I have a chance to recover from all I've been through, and still get paid while I'm at it! Maybe this once the system will work in the little guys favor! (fingers crossed nothing goes wrong).
-T
Posted by Partlycloudy on July 31, 2008, at 19:21:07
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time, posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 21:49:10
TC, you are going through a really harrowing experience with your boss. I hope that your time off helps you feel better. I've been made more sick by my job and my supervisors before - it can be traumatizing. Please be extra good to yourself.
PC
Posted by TexasChic on July 31, 2008, at 22:46:30
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time, posted by Partlycloudy on July 31, 2008, at 19:21:07
> TC, you are going through a really harrowing experience with your boss. I hope that your time off helps you feel better. I've been made more sick by my job and my supervisors before - it can be traumatizing. Please be extra good to yourself.
>
> PC
I've only told yall the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the mind games this woman plays. I was so worried about her being mad when I called in this morning, instead she's all like, "Well are you okay?" and more questions of concern like "What do you have to do?", and I said, "I really don't care to discuss that". She said, "No, no, I don't want to know anything, I just want to make sure YOU'RE going to be OKAY." Then she said to give her a call at least once a week to let her know I'm alright or she would be worried. Is it me, or is that twisted? That's why I call her Jeckle and Hyde. That's also why I call her PsychoBitch. Maybe now I can include 'manipulative guilt tripper'. Hmmm, maybe. ' Jeckle the ManipulativeGuiltTripperPsychoBitch'.-T
Posted by TexasChic on July 31, 2008, at 23:14:55
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time, posted by Partlycloudy on July 31, 2008, at 19:21:07
> TC, you are going through a really harrowing experience with your boss. I hope that your time off helps you feel better. I've been made more sick by my job and my supervisors before - it can be traumatizing. Please be extra good to yourself.
>
> PCI forgot to say thanks for the support!
I've been doing all these things around the house. I decided to recycle this belt I love but never looked right on me (its this fabric Indian looking thing - I love stuff from India}, and I tacked it up around the border of the shelf I put up over my fireplace. (The one I put up to look like a mantle). It looks really cool.
Then I found these (again Indian looking) string of velvet stars that were actually Xmas tree decoration, and draped it along the top of my curtain rod. It makes it look kind of mystical.
Next I'm thinking of making slip covers for the chairs at my kitchen table. I only have two chairs, and have the table pushed up against the wall like a cafe. I have these sheets that I liked the pattern but were always a bit scratchy, and the pillow cases fit perfectly over the backs of the chairs. That's got to work some how don't you think? My sewing skills are abismal at best, mostly because I don't have the patience to make perfect little even stitches. I may have to either invest in one of those infomercial hand held sewing thingys. Or a hot glue gun.
Its fun to have energy and feel the creativity flowing through me!!!
-T
Posted by Larry Hoover on August 1, 2008, at 19:06:15
In reply to I am now on illness recovery time, posted by TexasChic on July 30, 2008, at 19:23:50
IMHO, it is your boss who should be concerned about being fired.
Lar
Posted by TexasChic on August 2, 2008, at 22:06:30
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time » TexasChic, posted by Larry Hoover on August 1, 2008, at 19:06:15
I told her about my month off, and how I was going to devote my time to hard core job hunting. She said instead, I should take the first two weeks just to do nothing (or whatever I want). She said to get a lot of sleep and give myself some time to really relax and actually recover from the trauma I've been dealing with for so long at work. I don't think I would have been able to do that if she hadn't told me to. I guess I was just so worried somebody might think I was using this as an excuse for a vacation, that I felt I had to fill my up days with some sort of work. But she said for the next two weeks to pretend I AM on vacation. Isn't that a trip! I think a visit to Half Price Books may be in order! (I'm such a wild child aren't I).
-T
Posted by Bobby on August 5, 2008, at 11:03:03
In reply to Went to T today, posted by TexasChic on August 2, 2008, at 22:06:30
Posted by TexasChic on August 5, 2008, at 18:06:08
In reply to Just something » TexasChic, posted by Bobby on August 5, 2008, at 11:03:03
Very interesting! It actually makes a lot of sense. It sounds like my job, the workload just keeps increasing but no new people are hired. And the industry I work in is definitely dependent on the economy.
Of course, I believe my boss would be psycho even in the best of conditions, but all the things listed in the article probably made things worse.
-T
Posted by Kath on August 11, 2008, at 21:28:53
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time, posted by TexasChic on July 31, 2008, at 22:46:30
> I've only told yall the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the mind games this woman plays. I was so worried about her being mad when I called in this morning, instead she's all like, "Well are you okay?" and more questions of concern like "What do you have to do?", and I said, "I really don't care to discuss that". She said, "No, no, I don't want to know anything, I just want to make sure YOU'RE going to be OKAY." Then she said to give her a call at least once a week to let her know I'm alright or she would be worried. Is it me, or is that twisted? That's why I call her Jeckle and Hyde. That's also why I call her PsychoBitch. Maybe now I can include 'manipulative guilt tripper'. Hmmm, maybe. ' Jeckle the ManipulativeGuiltTripperPsychoBitch'.
>
> -T**********Hi TC - so sorry - I was away for a week, so haven't been online.
I think this is SO weird....is it the same person????? Jeckel & Hyde for sure.
Just reading the other posts.
luv, Kath
PS - I am glad you have the time off & HR has assured you your job will be waiting. Closer to the time when you go back, it might be an idea to let them know how she handled the LAST time you were off with the 'okee dokee, now you have twice as much work to do hunee' attitude. ANYway - that's not yet! I don't trust her as far as I could throw her. (sorry - but I DON'T like it when my friends are treated badly!)
Anyway, when the time comes, I suspect you'll be feeling WAYYYYYYYY better.
Hugs, Kath
Posted by Kath on August 11, 2008, at 21:32:18
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time, posted by TexasChic on July 31, 2008, at 23:14:55
> Next I'm thinking of making slip covers for the chairs at my kitchen table. I only have two chairs, and have the table pushed up against the wall like a cafe. I have these sheets that I liked the pattern but were always a bit scratchy, and the pillow cases fit perfectly over the backs of the chairs. That's got to work some how don't you think? My sewing skills are abismal at best, mostly because I don't have the patience to make perfect little even stitches. I may have to either invest in one of those infomercial hand held sewing thingys. Or a hot glue gun.
>
> Its fun to have energy and feel the creativity flowing through me!!!
>
> -T**********Nobody will see the stitches anyhow!
You sound 'liberated'!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you having this much-deserved time to heal.
YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!!!!
luv, kath
ps - I wish I were close & could come & see your place. It sounds wonderful. xoxo K
Posted by Kath on August 11, 2008, at 21:33:33
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time » TexasChic, posted by Larry Hoover on August 1, 2008, at 19:06:15
> IMHO, it is your boss who should be concerned about being fired.
>
> Lar*********I wonder if she got 'talked to' as a result of TC expressing concerns to HR about getting fired as a result of being off sick!
K
Posted by Kath on August 11, 2008, at 21:35:53
In reply to Went to T today, posted by TexasChic on August 2, 2008, at 22:06:30
YAY - I'm so glad your T said all that good stuff.
YES - do think of it as a vacation.
YES - a trip to the 2nd hand book store sounds definitely like a necessity!
This is time for YOU. To do whatever you want & to NOT feel like you have to accomplish ANYthing!
luv Kath
Posted by TexasChic on August 13, 2008, at 21:19:34
In reply to Re: I am now on illness recovery time, posted by Kath on August 11, 2008, at 21:32:18
Thanks for the support Kath! I've got one slipcover done and the other almost done. They're turning out to be really cute (and you're right, you can't see the stitching). In my bedroom I draped one of those long scarves (the kind you drape over the curtain rods with your curtains) on the wall where a headboard would be if I had one, and it looks really pretty and girly. I also put up some curtains over the sliding glass door to the patio, which not only keeps more of the heat out, it looks much better too. So I'm having fun and actually wouldn't mind having someone over now!
And my new T is working about really well. She's different from the other one I had, but in good ways. My old one was more about forgetting the past and making changes to my life now, whereas this one is more into examining my feelings and finding the reasons why I keep finding myself in the same unhappy situations.
The best news of all though, is I have an interview Friday and it sounds like just what I've been looking for. Its a small company, very laid back, and the things they're looking for are exactly what my strengths are. Its only about 15-20 minutes away too. So wish me luck!
-T
Posted by TexasChic on August 13, 2008, at 21:46:42
In reply to Re: Went to T today » TexasChic, posted by Kath on August 11, 2008, at 21:35:53
Posted by Jay_Bravest_Face on August 13, 2008, at 23:27:07
In reply to Things are going pretty well » Kath, posted by TexasChic on August 13, 2008, at 21:19:34
> Thanks for the support Kath! I've got one slipcover done and the other almost done. They're turning out to be really cute (and you're right, you can't see the stitching). In my bedroom I draped one of those long scarves (the kind you drape over the curtain rods with your curtains) on the wall where a headboard would be if I had one, and it looks really pretty and girly. I also put up some curtains over the sliding glass door to the patio, which not only keeps more of the heat out, it looks much better too. So I'm having fun and actually wouldn't mind having someone over now!
>
> And my new T is working about really well. She's different from the other one I had, but in good ways. My old one was more about forgetting the past and making changes to my life now, whereas this one is more into examining my feelings and finding the reasons why I keep finding myself in the same unhappy situations.
>
> The best news of all though, is I have an interview Friday and it sounds like just what I've been looking for. Its a small company, very laid back, and the things they're looking for are exactly what my strengths are. Its only about 15-20 minutes away too. So wish me luck!
>
> -THi TC:
That is good to hear some positive stuff. I wish you the absolute best of luck with your new interview, but maybe try to think it over in your mind beforehand. I mean, think about what has been "miserable" at past jobs, and your current experience, and maybe try to come up with some questions, such as "Will I be working independently or more as part of a group?" And really press them on it, because independence seems to be a real strength with you, while the whole "group-speak" seems to cause problems. And don't worry....this is an area of concern with me too (and probably millions others out there.). When working in groups, there is almost always the chance of ending up with one or two narcissists or nasty people. I took my job working mostly nights and afternoons so I don't have to work with a bunch of pesky people!..lol.
One day, one little step at a time. Sounds like you are enjoying doing little things around your home, and that is a nice rewarding thing. Do what you can to "reconnect" with building up yourself, making yourself feel good. We lose that in depression/anxiety, and that is a key to healing.
How are your medications working out? Are you getting REALLY good symptom control, or? Please take good care of yourself, stay safe from the "wolves" out there.Lots of good healing vibes going your way...:)
Jay
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