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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 62 to 86 of 95. Go back in thread:
Posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34
In reply to Psychobabble Reunion, posted by Dinah on July 17, 2013, at 10:03:35
It's been ages since I last came to this site - probably years and years. I think the last time I came was just after Bob visited Cape Town and came to meet me. Probably four or five years ago.
I remember I invited him to a strange awkward welcoming dinner at my home with friends of mine and friends of his, all psychiatrists and psychologists except me; I remember the next day we went for a long hike up Table Mountain and discussed psychobabble, and almost missed the last cable car down in the evening; I remember a green flash as the sun set over the Atlantic as we drove home; and a farewell dinner where he ordered chocolate steak.
I'm not sure why I stopped coming to psychobabble after that.
I was feeling sad and lonely this evening, and for some strange reason, out of the blue I googled psychobabble (I don't even have it bookmarked any more), and the first post I came across was Dinah's, talking about a reunion.
Dear Dinah, I hope you are well?
I suddenly felt a strong feeling of nostalgia and homesickness. Has the reunion already taken place? If it hasn't I would love to be part of it. I remember how I used to login here every day, often several times, and how I used to write to the Samaritans when Psychobabble wasn't enough, when I didn't want to frighten my friends here or my therapist with how bad things really were. At times they were really bad.
That all feels far away now. Things are better now in many ways. But sometimes I still feel lonely.
Please let me know about the reunion.
Posted by Dr. Bob on September 29, 2013, at 23:28:15
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34
> I remember I invited him to a strange awkward welcoming dinner at my home with friends of mine and friends of his, all psychiatrists and psychologists except me; I remember the next day we went for a long hike up Table Mountain and discussed psychobabble, and almost missed the last cable car down in the evening; I remember a green flash as the sun set over the Atlantic as we drove home; and a farewell dinner where he ordered chocolate steak.
I also remember your warmth and hospitality and the enthusiasm we shared about the possibilities for Babble. What a pleasure to "see" you again.
Bob
Posted by alexandra_k on October 2, 2013, at 3:45:08
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34
I remember you. I remember you were from South Africa, because I have a friend from South Africa and I remember thinking of you speaking with her accent. And I've been thinking a lot about 'a room of ones own' which was... Virginia Wolf? And I remembered that we used to have someone with a similar name to that here...
I don't think the reunion has happened yet.
I feel sad. Because reunions are reminiscing about the past. But I guess I need to accept that that is what Babble is for a lot of people these days. And it is what it is. Maybe someone will follow up on setting a time / place / date soon...
Posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:22:02
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on September 29, 2013, at 16:00:34
Hi vwoolf! It's nice to see you.
It's funny that your participation with Babble ended after you met with Bob. Do you think it made it more real and less anonymous?
Your therapist was psychoanalytic, right? Are you still in therapy?
I hope someone does pick up the ball and plan the reunion. But in the meantime, maybe this could be a reunion thread for anyone who wants to touch base?
Posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:23:53
In reply to reunion, posted by antigua2013 on September 1, 2013, at 23:47:32
I'd like that too. How are you doing?
A few people have stopped by lately, which is nice.
Posted by vwoolf on October 11, 2013, at 12:21:38
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion » vwoolf, posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:22:02
I'm not sure why I stopped at that point. Perhaps it wasn't a single reason but a combination of different things. My life got much busier and fuller at that point, with friends I could open up to about my inner world, and so I had less time and felt less need for Babble. I had come through what my therapist proudly referred to as a very successful therapy and in fact I terminated around that time, and so I suppose it was quite natural that Babble would hold less interest for me. Did it have anything to do with meeting Bob? Possibly, but not because it made him real, although of course it did that. I really enjoyed meeting him and it felt helpful to me to be treated as an equal. However I also felt slightly different from everyone else on Babble, as if I had been singled out and made special, and I remember being reluctant to talk about our meeting. I remember wanting not to talk about the fact that he had come to my house in particular. In part I suppose I was afraid that people would be envious, but another part of me felt ashamed, as if I had done something wrong. The legacy of incest again, you see. Sigh. Meeting Bob was great, but it triggered old feelings.
Do I regret meeting him? Not for a moment. I think he should continue to meet with Babblers whenever he can. I think there is something very healing in this kind of encounter. I remember we talked a lot about Babble and how helpful it had been for me. I actually think it saved my life, and I am very grateful to the babble community and Bob for this.
You are right, my therapy was psychoanalytic. After I terminated I took about six months break and then began again with a Jungian analyst. This analysis, unlike the previous therapy, feels very smooth, and is opening me up creatively in the most extraordinary way. My life for the most part has become rich and complex.
Posted by alexandra_k on October 13, 2013, at 20:42:13
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on October 11, 2013, at 12:21:38
I'm familiar with that feeling, too. I think I usually try and rationalize it away or otherwise avoid feeling it. In some respects it seems beautiful, though. Thankyou for sharing. It helps me feel less alone.
Posted by vwoolf on October 14, 2013, at 12:04:59
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion » vwoolf, posted by alexandra_k on October 13, 2013, at 20:42:13
I remember you too. Aren't you from New Zealand? Weren't you starting post-grad studies some time back in a different country? Are you still busy with them?
Posted by alexandra_k on October 14, 2013, at 20:02:19
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion » alexandra_k, posted by vwoolf on October 14, 2013, at 12:04:59
Yes. I went to Australia to study. Back in NZ now, finishing things up. Plan to start Bio-Medical Science in NZ next year. Maybe I'll be Dr Dr :-)
Posted by antigua2013 on October 16, 2013, at 22:23:05
In reply to Re: reunion » antigua2013, posted by Dinah on October 9, 2013, at 20:23:53
Hello Dinah,
I hope things are well with you. I need to catch up with the boards.
Life has been pretty complicated so I had to stop writing.
Therapy-wise, I'm still in it, despite my best intentions to be done with it. In the midst of painful times, but I have hope!
Take care,
antigua
Posted by alexandra_k on October 27, 2013, at 15:29:59
In reply to Re: Psychobabble Reunion, posted by vwoolf on October 11, 2013, at 12:21:38
> My life for the most part has become rich and complex.
I keep thinking about this...
I have found myself wondering a lot about what the point is. Underneath or behind the defenses there is (for me) this awful fragmentation. So I have been having trouble understanding why it is that one would want to work towards doing them less, or whatever. I mean, I've really been having a hard time with this.
Complexity.
Perhaps that is it. A lot of my defenses seem to be about simplifying things. Breaking off a chunk because a bigger picture is too much. Too unwieldy for me to deal with, or something. But the cost of a simple bit is lots of little simple bits and a fairly fragmented life in its own way.
Anyway. I'm not sure if that makes sense. But this feeling. Ambivalence. Variations of something like that. Complexity. That is... Rich. And pleasing somehow. Maybe that is it. Part of it at least.
Posted by vwoolf on January 11, 2014, at 4:48:09
In reply to reunion, posted by antigua2013 on September 1, 2013, at 23:47:32
I'll be coming to the US for a mental illness conference next month, and will be in Chicago on 23rd February. Would any fellow Babblers be interested and available for a small reunion? Dr Bob, would you?
I would like that very much.
Posted by Dr. Bob on January 17, 2014, at 0:35:51
In reply to Re: reunion » antigua2013, posted by vwoolf on January 11, 2014, at 4:48:09
> I'll be coming to the US for a mental illness conference next month, and will be in Chicago on 23rd February. Would any fellow Babblers be interested and available for a small reunion? Dr Bob, would you?
>
> I would like that very much.I would also.
Bob
Posted by Dr. Bob on January 23, 2014, at 3:04:38
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Dr. Bob on January 17, 2014, at 0:35:51
> > I'll be coming to the US for a mental illness conference next month, and will be in Chicago on 23rd February. Would any fellow Babblers be interested and available for a small reunion?
OK, here's the plan. Sun. afternoon 2/23 is definite and Mon. morning 2/24 is a possibility. If it's just Sun. afternoon, we'd meet close to the airport. So far, there's two of us. Anybody else?
Bob
PS: If you'd prefer to be more private about your interest, please feel free just to email me.
Posted by Poet on January 24, 2014, at 13:28:00
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Dr. Bob on January 23, 2014, at 3:04:38
I could meet on Sunday afternoon and near the airport is okay. I'll just drive instead of taking the train.
Poet
Posted by vwoolf on January 24, 2014, at 13:51:43
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Poet on January 24, 2014, at 13:28:00
Dear Poet, I'm so glad you will be coming. I remember your name and quite a few things about you from years ago when Babble was about all that kept me alive.
It will be wonderful to meet a fellow babbler at last.
My flight is scheduled to arrive in Chicago at about 12.00
Looking forward to meeting you and Dr Bob then.
Best
vwoolf
Posted by vwoolf on February 5, 2014, at 1:36:27
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February » Poet, posted by vwoolf on January 24, 2014, at 13:51:43
Ok, my trip is confirmed. Are we still on? I hope so.
Posted by Dr. Bob on February 6, 2014, at 2:30:20
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by vwoolf on February 5, 2014, at 1:36:27
> Ok, my trip is confirmed. Are we still on? I hope so.
I'm still on! Mon. morning, too, or just Sun. afternoon?
Bob
Posted by Poet on February 6, 2014, at 17:58:56
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by vwoolf on February 5, 2014, at 1:36:27
I'm still on for Sun. afternoon.
Poet
Posted by Dr. Bob on February 7, 2014, at 17:03:10
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Dr. Bob on February 6, 2014, at 2:30:20
> Mon. morning, too, or just Sun. afternoon?
Maybe the more relevant question is, Sun. evening, too, or just Sun. afternoon?
Bob
Posted by Poet on February 8, 2014, at 17:23:17
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Dr. Bob on February 7, 2014, at 17:03:10
Sunday afternoon and (early) evening would work for me.
Poet
Posted by vwoolf on February 9, 2014, at 4:37:54
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Poet on February 8, 2014, at 17:23:17
Sorry I haven't been getting back to you, but there is a new complication. I have been invited to speak at a university on the west coast and am having to reschedule my travel plans to try and include that as well as Chicago and my conference. I'll be in touch in the next day or so as soon as things firm up.
Apologies for the uncertainty. V
Posted by Dr. Bob on February 9, 2014, at 23:29:35
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by vwoolf on February 9, 2014, at 4:37:54
> I have been invited to speak at a university on the west coast
It's great you're in such high demand! Do please keep us posted,
Bob
Posted by vwoolf on February 10, 2014, at 0:03:23
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by Dr. Bob on February 9, 2014, at 23:29:35
It's called "living in the fast lane".
The thing is, having come so far (physically and metaphorically), I'm trying to do as much as I can with the little time I have.
The trouble is, I'm feeling exhausted already, and I haven't even left home yet.
Sigh.
V
Posted by Dr. Bob on February 11, 2014, at 12:34:12
In reply to Re: reunion in Chicago on 23rd February, posted by vwoolf on February 10, 2014, at 0:03:23
> It's called "living in the fast lane".
>
> The thing is, having come so far (physically and metaphorically), I'm trying to do as much as I can with the little time I have.
>
> The trouble is, I'm feeling exhausted already, and I haven't even left home yet.The fast lane has pros and cons. Maybe it's time to shift gears?
Bob
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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