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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 11 to 35 of 35. Go back in thread:
Posted by stargazer2 on December 22, 2013, at 16:09:14
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by Phillipa on December 21, 2013, at 18:37:56
Really, if Costa Rico is the place why do you have to ask if someone can afford it? Isn't that up to them to decide if they can afford it or if the thought of going there is enough without making it an experience that they have to make it a practical decision.
Posted by stargazer2 on December 22, 2013, at 16:12:54
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » Lamdage22, posted by gadchik on December 21, 2013, at 11:44:13
I've done all of these things without any improvement in my situation. It isn't always such an easy answer. Animals, nursing homes and nature don't always restore your will to live...sometimes the will to die is much stronger than the will to live. It isn't what I want but it is what it is.
Posted by baseball55 on December 22, 2013, at 19:29:08
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life/Posters, posted by stargazer2 on December 22, 2013, at 16:12:54
> I've done all of these things without any improvement in my situation. It isn't always such an easy answer. Animals, nursing homes and nature don't always restore your will to live...sometimes the will to die is much stronger than the will to live. It isn't what I want but it is what it is.
I have felt this way many times. I don't know if there is an answer. Sometimes I have hope, sometimes I don't. I try to keep connected in whatever ways possible. Sometimes that helps, sometimes it doesn't.
I wish you the best and pray you try to stay connected and keep, at least, posting and reaching out. That feeling of disconnection is the most painful feeling in the world. That feeling of wanting to give up is so painful, and so hard, too. Because suicide is not an easy thing to complete. The mind and body fight against it. I know. I have attempted suicide three times. I have spent weeks, months, in psych wards.
Keep posting, if you can. Keep trying. I wish you hope and peace. But mostly hope.
Posted by stargazer2 on December 22, 2013, at 20:21:52
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life/Posters » stargazer2, posted by baseball55 on December 22, 2013, at 19:29:08
BB. Thank you for your heartfelt comments. I have tried suicide only once (following my divorce in 2010), followed by ECT(2011), which really messed up my mind. In 2 week, I'm going to be part of a research trial of TMS but only a few treatments which concerns me but at least its something.
If I was still married or had a family I believe my situation would be more tolerable. The deression drove my husband away...he felt I never loved him which was possible given my inability to show love or affection to him. I thought he would just love me for me after so many years, it was a total shock that he wanted out. Now I find myself alone with few friends and no purpose in life. That is my mantra..."I have no idea what I am supposed to be doing"..without a job or family, life has no purpose and I'm not well enough to work so I do some volunteering, walk my dog, and little else. It is a intolerable.
Posted by Phillipa on December 22, 2013, at 20:56:10
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life/Posters, posted by stargazer2 on December 22, 2013, at 20:21:52
Stargazer what you have is more than many you are volunteering did that before nursing and loved it no pressure or stress, a dog is more loving than any human I've ever met, and you are outside moving around and doing things. This to me is what life is about. One doesn't have to prove their worth with a job. Been there done that now have to accept that this part of my life is over and will never be back as now retired. Phillipa
Posted by Lamdage22 on December 23, 2013, at 2:19:26
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » Lamdage22, posted by gadchik on December 21, 2013, at 16:34:07
> Wow,that place is somewhere I want to go. Would love to go there and chill for a month. It looks like heaven come down to earth. Give it a go!
Thats what i thought. Going for a month and then deciding.
Its better than a home for mentally ill where i just suffer without end.
Posted by Lamdage22 on December 23, 2013, at 3:47:24
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by Lamdage22 on December 23, 2013, at 2:19:26
The only fear i have is that the meditation could set me up for yet another psychosis.
Idk. Really. If the place were only a bit less spiritual.
Posted by gadchik on December 23, 2013, at 7:25:21
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by Lamdage22 on December 23, 2013, at 3:47:24
Idk. Really. If the place were only a bit less spiritual.
Exactly what my husband said when I presented him with the idea of going there. But I believe u can opt out of most of the things. It looks lovely to me. :)
Posted by Lamdage22 on December 23, 2013, at 11:03:51
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » Lamdage22, posted by gadchik on December 23, 2013, at 7:25:21
> Idk. Really. If the place were only a bit less spiritual.
>
> Exactly what my husband said when I presented him with the idea of going there. But I believe u can opt out of most of the things. It looks lovely to me. :)There are lots of other villages and especially unfinished projects.
I am researching the topic.
I love the idea of a mini-community. People from all countries and walks of life. Raw food. Jobs. Lots of group activities. Surfing. 12h sunshine year round.
How i would love to a place like this if it exists. I would want to blend in with the people.
Posted by Lamdage22 on December 23, 2013, at 13:13:01
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » Lamdage22, posted by gadchik on December 23, 2013, at 7:25:21
> Idk. Really. If the place were only a bit less spiritual.
>
> Exactly what my husband said when I presented him with the idea of going there. But I believe u can opt out of most of the things. It looks lovely to me. :)I found two other places. One is finished and you can visit. Its called http://www.osamountainvillage.net/1000-per-month/
And the even better one in the future:http://www.serenitygardensecovillage.com
Looks pretty cool.
Lets meet down there ;)
Posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 13:53:38
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by Lamdage22 on December 23, 2013, at 11:03:51
you could volunteer someplace in the tropics. i've been looking into it a little and there seems to be a range of stuff... from really living with the locals to basically living with the tourists in the resort town.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 20:38:02
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 13:53:38
one of the questions that got me interested in philosophy was 'what is the meaning of life'
if there is anything like a philosophical consensus... and there sorta is... it is this:
the relevant question is more... what do you find meaningful in life? what is it that you think makes life meaningful / gives life meaning?
here is one way to get a handle on that (perhaps)...
imagine that you are 105 years old. on your death bed. your time has come. organ system failure kind of thing. when you look back on your life... the most meaningful things you see are...
what?
what is important to you?
what would you like to do with your life?
what would you like to achieve?
what would you like to try and achive?
(better to try and have failed than never to have tried at all. i think... most of us see some glory and beauty and value in... for instance... athletes training... who never medal).once you know what things are important to you... then it is about figuring out (by a series of small steps) how you get from where you are right now... to wherever you want to be (where the idea is that trying to achieve that is something that you will value on your deathbed - whether you actually succeed or not).
but sometimes...
we don't feel like doing the things we believe.. we should do. the things that will make us happy (in the sense of the satisfaction we get out of doing / pursuing something we value).
on your death bed...
does that matter? does it matter whether you felt like it or not? if you don't feel afraid you don't get to display the virtue of courage. because courage is about *feeling the fear* and then *doing what you know you should do* despite the fear. if you don't feel the fear... you can't act from courage.
i think sometimes it is important to acknowledge and really make room for how things feel.
and i think sometimes it is important to feel that feeling - and act differently anyway.
and i think that sometimes... that acting different results in the feeling changing. and that even when it does not... it might result in our doing something that we would value. on our deathbed.
i don't know if any of that makes any sense...
the meaning of life: according to me haha. what is the meaning of life? doing things YOU find meaningful. that is the meaning of your life. it is what gives (you) meaning to your life. and really... that's all that matters. yeah?
Posted by Phillipa on December 23, 2013, at 22:17:14
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 20:38:02
My Mother died when she was 48 and I 17. She would always say if I'd only. So as soon as out of high school I did all the things I wanted to do. Traveled Europe, the Carribean, Mexico, Other Islands, San Francisco. I even visited her last living relatives in Germany. As I didn't want to be on my death bed and look back and say if only I had. Add RN School as a highlight the real meaning of my life, kids, and pets. Phillipa
Posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 22:48:11
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » alexandra_k, posted by Phillipa on December 23, 2013, at 22:17:14
so now... where you are now...
what would you like between now and when you go?
what is important to you / what do you want for yourself?
Posted by Lamdage22 on December 25, 2013, at 4:16:51
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by alexandra_k on December 23, 2013, at 22:48:11
> so now... where you are now...
>
> what would you like between now and when you go?
>
> what is important to you / what do you want for yourself?I would like to reunite with my ex GF. But who wants to be with a sick man?
Posted by Lamdage22 on December 25, 2013, at 7:05:09
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by Lamdage22 on December 25, 2013, at 4:16:51
I see all the things i would want to be. That i could be it makes everything even more painful
Posted by stargazer2 on December 25, 2013, at 13:36:23
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life/Posters » stargazer2, posted by Phillipa on December 22, 2013, at 20:56:10
Why did you make this about yourself? Your situation is very differnt than mine. You have not had the depression that I have had and those things you mention that are what life is all about is not what I want my life to be about. So you are no understanding me at all.
I do have to prove my worth with a job maybe you didn't. You accepted your depression and accepted that you are now retired, I have not and will not accept this.
I just want to have a normal life where I can relate to others and this is not the case. I am isolated, have no husband, unlike you, and can't rely on volunteering for my self esteem. I hate every minute I volunteer so again we differ greatly with that. I find it demeaning when I should be able to work and be productive to some degree, just becasue I should be able to work and you were probably able to as well.
So, those are the differences between us at a minumum.
Posted by alexandra_k on December 25, 2013, at 15:41:54
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » alexandra_k, posted by Phillipa on December 23, 2013, at 22:17:14
17 is young to have your mother die. were you close before that?
Posted by Phillipa on December 25, 2013, at 22:32:50
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » Phillipa, posted by alexandra_k on December 25, 2013, at 15:41:54
Alex sick from the time I was two. I raised myself. Basically lived alone as she was always in hospital and Father had Sister somewhere no idea where? Phillipa
Posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 20:11:16
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » alexandra_k, posted by Phillipa on December 25, 2013, at 22:32:50
> Alex sick from the time I was two. I raised myself. Basically lived alone as she was always in hospital and Father had Sister somewhere no idea where? Phillipa
huh. was that why you wanted to be a nurse?
Posted by Phillipa on December 27, 2013, at 21:05:09
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 20:11:16
Alex I just liked it some asked the same when I was in school. Never connected it. Phillipa
Posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 22:23:38
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » alexandra_k, posted by Phillipa on December 27, 2013, at 21:05:09
i think it is common for people who grow up helping their family to want to go on helping... to maybe... have a world view that that is what life is about... or something like that.
maybe not... but there are a bunch of other things out there that you could have chosen to do... and you chose nursing. which is about helping. so... maybe your early experience of helping is why.
when i say i want to be a surgeon... people ask me what operations i have had. and then orthopdeics doesn't seem to surprising.. I guess it is about circumstances that affected us... enough to... alter the course of our life trajectory. to give us something that we think would be meaningful to do with our life.
Posted by Phillipa on December 27, 2013, at 22:55:10
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 22:23:38
I also volunteered in a hospital psych ward just talking with the patients had to report anything that the staff should know and did ot with them. I did the aerobic dancing I taught with a young group of patients too and just loved it. The OT person I worked with wanted me to be an Occupational therapist but with 3 children at home and the school over a hour away. I went to the community college and it was suggested nursing. Had never thought of doing that. I thought it was the most fabulous idea so did it. No regrets. Phillipa
Posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 23:01:38
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life » alexandra_k, posted by Phillipa on December 27, 2013, at 22:55:10
wow. so you did nursing while looking after 3 kids and a husband? i could never have done anything like that.
are you retired now? i don't quite know where you are with your life. did you marry again?
(ignore me if i'm being invasive. it just seems that most people have some sort of coherent life story about such stuff as this that they consider public knowledge)
i really am curious.
Posted by Lamdage22 on December 29, 2013, at 4:28:07
In reply to Re: Is there a point to life, posted by alexandra_k on December 27, 2013, at 23:01:38
I cant figure this out.. i have problem with life so strong.
Everything i take only works initially. Im going to try fish-oil and NAC now.
It seems my condition only gets worse with time.
This is the end of the thread.
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