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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 3 of 3. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on January 18, 2012, at 12:15:09
listen the reason I wanted to address is because you have been here for a long time and I have read your posts that filled with vary long and extensive info and advice. I am in a sitatution that is not urgent, and doesnt require any special attnetion. It's just I'm very unhappy with this situation. The Nuvigel I take doesnt even work. All the meds that I have taken strattrea, wellbutrin, nuvigel have failed. It's like there not being absored or passing the blood brain barrier in the brain.
I don't want you to write a long post because I tend to write long posts about my sitaution and then wake up the next day and disregard them.
I can't go back to college until I am on the correct medication for attnetional issues and that is blocked by my mother.I've already wasted my time trying to reason with her. I have to move out of the house and get my own place, and get my own car that's in my name so I won't have to deal with possession issues over who's car I have.
I try to keep happy, because the depression I experience really dehabliates me. But of course it can be choice to be happy or be sad. I try to be happy but theres this "weight" that even when I am choosing to not be sad, it causes sadness.
Maybe could you just give me some tips?
Posted by larryhoover on January 19, 2012, at 13:59:03
In reply to Larry Hoover, posted by rjlockhart04-08 on January 18, 2012, at 12:15:09
I've been observing your struggles for some time, and I think I can simplify what I see in some basic ideas. They are expectations, and life management.
Your difficulties with some drugs (addiction) and failure to respond to others, tells me that medication will not address your root difficulties with life. I perceive that you are looking for something to fix you, to make your life okay. I think your expectations are unrealistic.
And then there is your home life. My own family of origin was very dysfunctional. The role models my parents provided did not prepare me to interact with other people. What I took as normal was not typical at all. I am still working on adjusting the ways my childhood taught me to behave, and I am 54. It's a life's work to manage better.
I see your difficulties as psycho-social, rather than psycho-medical. You need a good teacher, and a good plan of study. We call that counselling, where I come from. I've had plenty, and it really helped.
Until you get away from your mother, I really doubt you can begin to address your own issues, because you are so enmeshed with her.
If you were on your own, and responsible for your own food and housing (physical work would also be a good thing, IMHO), you could begin to look at what's really going on in your head, without interference. I strongly recommend learning mindfulness. It's a cognitive discipline, and it requires some effort. But well practised, it will show you how your thoughts drive your anxiety, frustration, and inattentiveness. In time, you will develop a sense of confident self-awareness, and be much more able to choose how you respond to stressors, or simple day to day affairs.
I don't know a shortcut, or anything helpful that isn't also hard work. I just don't believe that your family has prepared you to manage your life. It's never too late to learn.
The key component, just now, I believe is counselling. You need to have a trusted person in your life, to discuss with you what are reasonable expectations, and how to work towards achieving goals. Nobody can do this for you.
I like what Dinah said in this regard. Superman, or Prince Charming, isn't going to come knocking on your door to save you. That's not a realistic expectation. Nor is drugging yourself to a functional life, I'm afraid.
Lar
Posted by rjlockhart04-08 on January 19, 2012, at 19:27:14
In reply to Re: Larry Hoover » rjlockhart04-08, posted by larryhoover on January 19, 2012, at 13:59:03
Thank you for responding. I've read over your post a couple times and I do see that my life management skills need to work on, and away from home life. I mean there's nothing SERIOUS going on, it just I feel guily If I remove myself from people that love me and making a quick descion not to live with them. What I mean is...I've been here so long, I feel that this is where I'm suppost to be which is a mindset that can be redone and I need to learn to not feel guilty for leaving behind things that I have grown out of.
I do agree that I try to medicate diffrent things that need to be dealt with. But even when I did take what I needed like two stimulants, I still stayed at home and did not get out to be indepedent. I have to have a mindset to find hope in the world instead of find hope in being medicated. It's very difficult larry, but I do know that soon I will get a therpist. It's not that hard to move out on your own, because all you have is an income to pay the expenses. I've found comfort in stay at home away from things that cause me to do errors or cause problems. Some of it needs to be medication but 60-75% of it is all in the stratigical thinking how to deal with problems.
Much apprication,
Matt
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