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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 710 to 734 of 1838. Go back in thread:
Posted by bridgey1128 on October 6, 2004, at 14:18:48
In reply to Re: Thanks for the advice, posted by headachequeen on October 6, 2004, at 12:30:07
I know what you mean..my husband is pretty laid back. He is definitely the more passive one in the relationship. I feel like I almost have to nag him to get anything out of him. I am pretty controlling too. Must be a redhead thing. :P I think the Topomax has helped that a lot. I still struggle with it but because he is so passive and seems to be almost lackadasical about things I feel like I have to worry and stress about EVERYTHING! He tells me..you shouldn't worry so much! Well GEE! I hadn't thought about that! ONE of us has to! When he doesn't seem to care about anything or show any kind of emotion, whether he actually worries or not..I feel like I have to have the weight of the world on my shoulders. So I guess I come across as controlling in that respect because I feel like I have to do and worry about everything for the both of us when it comes to some things. Sometimes I would like to send him to a shrink. His facial expressions do not match his emotions sometimes. It's very odd. He can be telling me something horrid and smiling about it, but he says he's not happy. I don't know if this is his very odd way of trying to make me feel better about it but it's very unnerving. He also laughs at things that upset our son(who is ADHD) because he says that he wants him to know it's nothing to worry about....uh...this doesn't work. I have TRIED to explain this to him. I keep telling him he thinks that he is laughing AT him and making light of something that hurts and upsets him. WHY are some people so THICK! I really wonder if his emotions are screwed up sometimes. He is a very caring man and I know he loves me, but I cannot figure out why he does some things for the LIFE of me. Personality wise, our son is more like me and stresses more about things, so I tend to understand when he gets frustrated about things and I have to make my husband back off sometimes. Our son differs from me because he is more of an "engineer" personality and I am an "arts/music" person. Our daughter has more of my husbands laid back personality but more my artistic slant. She is the ultimate 3 year old redheaded diva. :P Don't get me wrong, she is very sweet, but she was BORN FOR THE STAGE! And she has an imagination to boot! And all the redhead elements. It's like they are both a perfect mix of our personalities and genes. He has daddy's hair color and mommy's eye color and looks like my brother the older he gets. Our daughter has curly hair like daddy with mommy's red flame but her daddy's blue eyes. I am hoping that neither one got mommy's bipolar. The ADHD was enough for our son. But he is on Concerta and doing great. Of course since he metabolizes like a redhead he has to take a regular Ritalin at 3pm. He's on the 54mg of Concerta. I dunno if that is a high dose or not. He's only 6 going to be 7 this month but this dose seems to be the one that works great. Well..I've rambled on enough again...
Posted by stressed on October 6, 2004, at 14:43:58
In reply to Re: Thanks for the advice, posted by bridgey1128 on October 6, 2004, at 14:18:48
I have to get off this computer and get some things accomplished around here. I haven't done anything since I got home from work!! It's nice getting to know you. Oh, speaking of enineering? My husband is a Chemical Engineer, if that tells you anything about him! Gotta Go....
Posted by headachequeen on October 6, 2004, at 15:23:23
In reply to Re: Thanks for the advice, posted by bridgey1128 on October 6, 2004, at 14:18:48
> I know what you mean..my husband is pretty laid back. He is definitely the more passive one in the relationship. I feel like I almost have to nag him to get anything out of him. I am pretty controlling too. Must be a redhead thing.
Oh we are something else, are we not <g>
My husband is calm, and easy going and does not fly off the handle about most things. I have seen him lose his temper only four times in all the years I have known him... wish I could say the same for myself (sigh)
He is inclined to work through a situation with the calm and sensible approach whereas I am inclined to the 'my way or the highway' approach...
controlling??? moi??? of course not...
my son went into the military... of course he did, I raised him for that life because it was the life I knew growing up and the life I understood... my husband grew up in civilian territory and does not understand either of us LOL
my daughters are highly dramatic and the younger is musical and has a magnificent voice and also looked toward the army as a career choice... that really confused my husband...
our adopted daughter, we adopted her when she was in her late teens because she needed to have family and a place to belong, is married to a soldier and went into the service her self when she was 25... says she felt it was something she had to do having been around me so much and is now a senior warrant officer... what we would have called a sergeant-major in my day...
controlling??? she????my psychiatrist says I suffer from adult hyperactive disorder, btw, Bridgey... and must have been hdd as a child... I am also a perfectionist... well, pardon me... I like things done properly and well... it is the way I was raised and being an only child it rather fell into being...
then there is this wonderful person I married who is patient and calm and the total foil to my overactive, demanding, perfectionist being...
we do make a pair...
but we have been together since we were in our late teens and we enjoy life together so very much... it must work...don't they say that opposites attract???
kat
Posted by iris2 on October 6, 2004, at 16:22:42
In reply to Re: Thanks for the advice » bridgey1128, posted by headachequeen on October 6, 2004, at 12:21:04
Please forgive me I honestly have no idea what in the h** I was talking about. I am very sorry especially as it seemed to be inclusive.
Irene
Posted by iris2 on October 6, 2004, at 16:28:15
In reply to Where are we coming from?, posted by stressed on October 6, 2004, at 13:57:50
Again my apologies. I reread some of the posts and I had not even read some of them. I have no idea what I was talking about. Perhaps I meant to post that somewhere else. I have to be honest and tell you I have no memory of posting this or why I would have.
Please forgive me.
irene
Posted by iris2 on October 6, 2004, at 16:29:59
In reply to Where are we coming from?, posted by stressed on October 6, 2004, at 13:57:50
Again sorry I also meant to say you are not dense perhaps I am occationally.
irene
Posted by stressed on October 7, 2004, at 8:20:21
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » stressed, posted by iris2 on October 6, 2004, at 16:29:59
I am totally dense, at least it seems so these days!!!
Posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 9:51:28
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » iris2, posted by stressed on October 7, 2004, at 8:20:21
> I am totally dense, at least it seems so these days!!!
Please, please do not think this especially because of some post I posted that made no sense at all even to me. I can only think that perhaps I was tired and meant to post that somewhere else as it makes no sense to me in any context. Really I feel terrible. I reread some of the posts preceeding what I posted to see if I could get a handle on what I meant and it made NO SENSE to me, so why would it to you or anyone else. I am the dense one!
Again please accept my apologies for posting something that made no sense, had no common thread with what preceeded it and confused everyone including myself.
irene
Posted by bridgey1128 on October 7, 2004, at 10:15:53
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » stressed, posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 9:51:28
No worries! We weren't mad. Just wondering what you were talking about. Everyone is entitled to a "duh" every now and then. Nothing wrong with that. I do it all the time. :)
Posted by stressed on October 7, 2004, at 14:19:06
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from?, posted by bridgey1128 on October 7, 2004, at 10:15:53
I'm just happy to know that I am not the only person who makes mistakes like that one!!! Don't worry another second about it. I think it's hillarious.
Posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 15:38:09
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from?, posted by bridgey1128 on October 7, 2004, at 10:15:53
Thanks I felt like a real jerk.
Irene
Posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 15:44:22
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » stressed, posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 9:51:28
> > I am totally dense, at least it seems so these days!!!
>
> Please, please do not think this especially because of some post I posted that made no sense at all even to me. I can only think that perhaps I was tired and meant to post that somewhere else as it makes no sense to me in any context. Really I feel terrible. I reread some of the posts preceeding what I posted to see if I could get a handle on what I meant and it made NO SENSE to me, so why would it to you or anyone else. I am the dense one!
>
> Again please accept my apologies for posting something that made no sense, had no common thread with what preceeded it and confused everyone including myself.
>
> ireneForget it.. we all do these things somewhere somtime in space... and it certainly made us sit up and take notice...
I just wondered it it was something I had said that upset you and wanted either to explain or apologise...
so now we forget it and don't worry about it...
as of now it is gone with the wind
all right???
great
kat
Posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 15:45:47
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » stressed, posted by iris2 on October 6, 2004, at 16:29:59
> Again sorry I also meant to say you are not dense perhaps I am occationally.
>
> ireneWhy should you be special? <g>
did you think you were the only person with these moments and days?
join the club... the line for membership applications forms to the right...
kat
Posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 15:45:52
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from?, posted by stressed on October 7, 2004, at 14:19:06
Posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 15:49:02
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » bridgey1128, posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 15:38:09
> Thanks I felt like a real jerk.
>
> Irene
I thought we had agreed to forget it...
it is gone with the wind ...
as for feeling like a jerk we leave that for the outsiders, the ones who aren't here... the ones who wish they were us...
we are the elite, the special ones, the ones who are here...
they are the jerks and wannabes...
LOL
and they are so jealous of us...
trust me.. I know...
I asked a few of them just the other day and they all agreed that we are so lucky to have each other...
they did, they told me so...
kat
Posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 18:21:14
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » iris2, posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 15:44:22
I really do feel like a big jerk. When I saw the first post asking about it I read what I posted and did not understand it. Then I went back and either read for the first time or reread the posts preceding it and it just made no sense to me for any reason what so ever. In fact a couple of posts preceding it I had only read parts of and not the whole post so what in the world could I have even been reacting too?
I am glad first of all that many of you caught it. It is good to know that people are reading posts an dpaying attention to their content. Even better that if someone feels there is something amiss or do not understand the post they question it. That says a lot for the attention to detail and people feeling competent to ask. Not sure about you guys (don’t want to infer something that might not be true), but it has taught me a lesson or two. First be more awake and at attention when I post and second a good feeling that I am conversing with some intelligent and caring people here.
Thanks for understanding. I will try and get over feeling like a dufus and continue to post on topic. Does that make sense?
But may I ask that we end this discussion now. Unless of course anyone feels they have some unresolved issues:)
irene
Posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 18:23:47
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » iris2, posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 15:45:47
I hope you were saying this in jest? Please refer to the following post:
Posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 18:25:06
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » iris2, posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 15:49:02
Posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 18:52:46
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » headachequeen, posted by iris2 on October 7, 2004, at 18:23:47
> I hope you were saying this in jest? Please refer to the following post:
Indeed I was speaking in jest...
why should you be special... as in why should you have the monopoly on bad days? We all have em and we all have the moments when we stick foot in mouth and bite it off at knee...
now, we have agreed to let it go...right? says she grinning....
I am now preparing myself for the disaster that follows Thanksgiving Day (Monday for those of you who live below the border <g>)
when suddenly this new neurologist thinks he should see me right away I begin to think I should be worrying...
but I do know that I will NOT be separated from my Topomax...
I will not put on that weight I lost and will NOT live with migraine again...
I get a migraine just thinking about it...
and I learned today that emotional stress can affect the vocal cords....
this thing we call a body is a really complex thing...
so why did the psychologist and the psychiatrist not tell me this already??????
arrgghhhhkat
Posted by stressed on October 8, 2004, at 11:44:30
In reply to Re: Where are we coming from? » iris2, posted by headachequeen on October 7, 2004, at 18:52:46
Hey everyone, I am not intending to sound obsessive, but M is at 100 mg of topamax and she is still hungry. I'm not sure about the binging, I try not to pry, don't want to make matters worse. She's not experiencing many symptoms other than the tingling feet, dry mouth, and occasional light-headedness. She will not go back to Dr. unti next week. What do you think? You know how much I value oppions on here. Have a good day. -L
Posted by iris2 on October 8, 2004, at 13:14:42
In reply to I don't know if it will work, posted by stressed on October 8, 2004, at 11:44:30
> Hey everyone, I am not intending to sound obsessive, but M is at 100 mg of topamax and she is still hungry. I'm not sure about the binging, I try not to pry, don't want to make matters worse. She's not experiencing many symptoms other than the tingling feet, dry mouth, and occasional light-headedness. She will not go back to Dr. unti next week. What do you think? You know how much I value oppions on here. Have a good day. -L
How long has she been on the Topimax? It takes a while for some of these meds to kick in and remember it is different for everyone. 100mg is not a large dose so she probably is still titrating up?
I think it is much more important to get the mood and binge eating problems under control and if the weight comes off at the same time great. But if she gets these under control she should have little problem loosing the extra pounds she has gained due to medication. I find it easier to loose pounds I gained from a medication than just from me eating!
Her emotional and mental well being is much more important than a few extra pounds.
Here are a few links I found that you might be intereted in reading about Topimax and binge eating.
http://remedyfind.com/rem.asp?ID=5536
http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/eating_disorders/site/story_edtreatment_2.htm
http://psychcentral.com/library/bingeeat_tx.htm
Hope they help.irene
Posted by stressed on October 8, 2004, at 14:02:20
In reply to Re: I don't know if it will work » stressed, posted by iris2 on October 8, 2004, at 13:14:42
Thanks so much for resonding to my post so quickly. You are so right. The binging must be under control first, and I am concerned that her doc. won't prescribe her anything higher than 100mg. I don't know if the binging has slowed down. I have noticed that she seems to get irritated much easier these days. I hope that goes away......!!! You are such a doll for sending me the links. Thanks a million. -L
Posted by headachequeen on October 8, 2004, at 14:18:53
In reply to Re: I don't know if it will work » iris2, posted by stressed on October 8, 2004, at 14:02:20
> Thanks so much for resonding to my post so quickly. You are so right. The binging must be under control first, and I am concerned that her doc. won't prescribe her anything higher than 100mg. I don't know if the binging has slowed down. I have noticed that she seems to get irritated much easier these days. I hope that goes away......!!! You are such a doll for sending me the links. Thanks a million. -L
100 mg is not a high dose actually as long as the time to between increments is slow and steady...
the binging will not come under control at once...
heaven knows, I have the occasional relapse and don't know why... just know that it happens...there are other issues that have to be dealt with to help her control the binging if it is done to help her escape those issues...
I know what my issues are and I have had help and more help (some of it even useful ) but I still have times when the issues take over...
at the moment I am in flashback mode... something and I do not know what, has triggered a return of memory that is in control... I know and understand the theory of it all... but I have to overcome it all...
I have to deal with the flashback, the memories, and the effects they have on me, the way these things take over and change my life and my feelings about life, about me, about the people around me, about my work... you name it...
I withdraw from the world and from the people who care most for me and even with the therapy and the topomax I have times of binging... why not eat? no one cares anyway and no one loves me...
if anyone loved me would they have let these things happen to me???
Oh I understand the rationale behind the flashback and the binging ALL too well...
so why am unable to simply give it all the boot...
that is the part that really upsets me...
and I am really able to disguise it with other people...
didn't I say this place was therapeutic????
you are the only people to whom I would admit the binging regression or that I binge at all...
when I mention eating disorders I refer only to the anorexia of my teens and early twenties...
of course it is in my past and I have it under control... remember I am a control freak..
and I let the world know it...
nothing is allowed to upset my world as far as the world knows...
I can even hide it from my psychologist a great deal of the time...
he keeps telling me that he is kicking me loose because I don't need him any longer... and often at times when things are blowing apart in my life...
your daughter needs to know that she is loved...
that you care for her as she is and who she is...
not what she is...
no matter what she does or does not achiever...
no matter how well she does anything...
no matter who does it better or worse...
you lover her..
after all, you gave birth to her, not the other cheerleader or the girl with the better mark or the better role in the school play or the one who did anything she did or should do... or didn't get to do...
nothing else matters but that you love her...
and will always love her...as for the rest, let her know that you want to help her when she wants your help or support...
let her know that you don't want to and will not nag about her weight or eating...
maybe she would like to help with the grocery and menu planning and shopping... what would she like to see in the fridge and cupboards to help her manage her plan...
there has to be a way to involve her loving and supportive mom in this so that she knows you don't care if she loses weight but you don't want to sabotage her either...
and if there is a problem at the root of it, then you would like to help eliminate the problem...and that you love her more than anything ...
love is a powerful thing... it can do so much and it can cripple if it becomes pity... but we have to use it for our children...
As for Topomax, it will not really start to take effect (control if you will<g>) until she is on morning and evening matched doses based on my experience...
minor weight loss which cheered me on
but the controls set in when I was on 200 in the evening then started the morning dosage too...
checked my seizure book today...
have to do the Readers' Digest version for the new neuro so when I found the notations about that I filed it mentally for you...Happy thanksgiving everyone
kat
Posted by bridgey1128 on October 8, 2004, at 14:26:25
In reply to Re: I don't know if it will work, posted by headachequeen on October 8, 2004, at 14:18:53
Happy Thanksgiving? Was I asleep for 2 months?
Posted by Dr. Bob on October 8, 2004, at 17:41:23
In reply to Re: I don't know if it will work, posted by bridgey1128 on October 8, 2004, at 14:26:25
> Happy Thanksgiving? Was I asleep for 2 months?
Sorry to interrupt, but I'd like to redirect follow-ups not about medication to Psycho-Babble Social. Here's a link:
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041001/msgs/400517.html
Thanks,
Bob
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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
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