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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 37. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by TexasChic on January 17, 2008, at 19:36:46
After last time, I figured anything I did would get me bitched out by my supervisor. So I just did as little as possible and sent an email to her telling her the time of my interview. Boy was that a mistake! She was so pissed!
I see now the way I should have played it. Its obvious what she wants is for me to feel indebted to her. By bypassing her it made her feel I was snubbing her authority. She told me when I get back Tuesday (I have some time off to compensate for the horrendous hours I've been working) we were going to have a meeting about the "proper way to go about applying for an internal job". She also said AGAIN, that they were going to call her and ask her what she thought about me, and she didn't know if she would feel comfortable recommending me for a job. I told her after last time I didn't think she wanted me to talk to her about it. She said, "That NEVER came out of my mouth!"
Of course, I eventually I started crying, and she told me she wasn't mad at me and I need to not take things so personally. I just sobbed. "I can't help it! Its just the way I am!" She kind of calmed down after that and said, "I know, we can't help who we are". Then after that she kind of changed her tone to how she could help me with this but not if I didn't tell her about it. So now our meeting Tuesday is about coaching me for my interview. What a fruitcake! I know I'm not perfect and there are probably a thousand ways I could have handled all this better, but still, she's being a LITTLE psycho. !@#$%
Okay, I'm better now. I just needed to vent about that. So hopefully things will go well at the interview, and if not, hopefully I can figure out how to mollify my supervisor. Because escaping isn't the answer, dealing with the present is what I've got to do. Not that an escape would be bad. Okay, so I'm giving myself a pep talk as I'm writing this. That's what I do here!
-T
Posted by ClearSkies on January 18, 2008, at 7:50:51
In reply to Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday!, posted by TexasChic on January 17, 2008, at 19:36:46
One of things that popped into my head about this - because I've been thinking about what other people say is always more about themselves and not about us - is that your boss probably wants to be able to come across as grooming you for this interview, or handing you over for another position, rather than be seen as having people trying to abandon her department for other places. Messed up, huh? But it kind of makes sense, if you think about it. So let her go through her motions, if you will, and let the good stuff filter through, but don't take all her coaching to heart, because her motivation is that she'll come across well in an interview, not you. Expect to hear her say that you should say lots of positive things about your experience in her department! (Making her look good, see?)
Huh.
(I wonder what others will think of my little theory!)
I'm glad you've got this opportunity to shine again, TC!
CS
Posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2008, at 12:34:38
In reply to Re: Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday! » TexasChic, posted by ClearSkies on January 18, 2008, at 7:50:51
I agree and TC has gone a long way forward lately. Good for her!!!!!!! Phillipa
Posted by TexasChic on January 18, 2008, at 19:19:41
In reply to Re: Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday! » ClearSkies, posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2008, at 12:34:38
Thanks yall. Your theory Clearskies, that's actually exactly what I thought! Especially when after she got over being indignant and our meeting that was supposed to be about "proper procedures" and blah, blah, blah, turned into helping me prepare for my interview.
Its funny, I just remembered one thing she said when she was ranting was, "You don't work for HR"! See, HR says I can apply for any job I want to, and they only tell my current supervisor about it as a courtesy. So that's why I know everything she's saying about proper procedure isn't necessarily true. But like you said, I need to let her 'help' me.
Actually she could be a lot of help if she wanted to but I get the feeling she might just make me more nervous. Everyone always thinks I'm too timid. They want me to be more outgoing. But I'm just going to be myself. That last interview actually went really well, I just didn't have the background they were looking for. I'm not big and bad and bold and all up in your face, but given the opportunity I can speak fairly intelligently and usually manage to make my interviewers laugh at least a couple of times.
Man, all these workplace politics are crazy! I've never worked anywhere quite so corporate, so I'm having to really step up my game with that sort of thing. But it honestly makes me wonder if I wouldn't be much, much happier working from home. I would be a total hermit then though, and that can't be good, can it?
-T
Posted by TexasChic on January 18, 2008, at 19:26:30
In reply to Re: Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday! » ClearSkies, posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2008, at 12:34:38
> I agree and TC has gone a long way forward lately. Good for her!!!!!!! Phillipa
Thanks P! I really have come a long way, especially for someone who suffers from anxiety and depression and all that fun stuff that drew me to babble. I guess that's why I like to share my work experiences here, I feel like the people here understand how difficult these things are for me. When I succeed its like one of 'us' breaking down a barrier, and I hope maybe it will encourage others to try. Does that make sense?
-T
Posted by Kath on January 18, 2008, at 20:01:15
In reply to Re: Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday!, posted by TexasChic on January 18, 2008, at 19:19:41
I think it might be pretty challenging working from home. First of all, I wonder how one would go about GETTING an at home job?
I think 'be yourself' is a good idea. Sounds like you're doing very well considering what your supervisor sounds like!!!
Kath
Posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2008, at 20:23:54
In reply to Re: Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday! » TexasChic, posted by Kath on January 18, 2008, at 20:01:15
Kath believe it or not half the people here work from home computer stuff as it costs less for the company with work space and sickness, absenses from work. One girl works here young 33 for marvel comics in California and travels there sometimes or NYC. IBM also uses a lot of at home workers in North Carolina. Phillipa
Posted by TexasChic on January 18, 2008, at 21:25:25
In reply to Re: Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday! » Kath, posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2008, at 20:23:54
... of why I should fight the whole becoming a hermit thing. I looked up a guy I went to college with, he was really cute and I liked him, but I was way too shy to ever pursue it. Anyway, I found his page and he was cute as ever, plus I was reminded of all the things I liked about him - his humor, his taste in music, his interests, ect. Oh, and of course, he got married last year. It just reminded me of what I'm missing and the fact that I DO want to find someone, and that there are guys out there that I could actually like, and would make it worth the stress of LEAVING THE HOUSE. It would be so easy to leave things just as they are, but I know deep down I want more than that. I've got to figure out a way to get out there and meet people/guys. Its just so hard!
-T
Posted by TexasChic on January 18, 2008, at 22:32:17
In reply to Okay, I just got a nice reminder..., posted by TexasChic on January 18, 2008, at 21:25:25
Get a therapist! Duh! I've started looking, but its giving me a headache. Life coach, humanistic, eclectic, hypnotism, biofeedback, there's just too much to filter through! Then half (or more) say they don't except insurance. Why would they not accept insurance? Obviously I need to quit for tonight. I'll try again tomorrow. Night night yall!
-T
Posted by Dinah on January 19, 2008, at 10:36:09
In reply to I know what I need to do, posted by TexasChic on January 18, 2008, at 22:32:17
From what I've read, life coaches don't accept insurance. I could be wrong, but the magazines for therapists that I've read seem to indicate that studying for life coaching gets you out of the managed healthcare system.
Can you do it the other way around? Most health insurance policies have a website with a list of providers, although your mental health policy might be with a separate company so you need to check.
You can make a list of providers then cross reference to your other sources to find likely candidates. I think I did that after Katrina.
Posted by TexasChic on January 19, 2008, at 16:54:30
In reply to Re: I know what I need to do, posted by Dinah on January 19, 2008, at 10:36:09
I'll do that, thanks! I had never heard of a "life coach" before I read it last night. It just sounded so cool and like just what I was looking for. Help with:
relationships
your career
spirituality and inner peace
figuring out what's missing from your life that keeps you from being happy
reducing stress
ect.But if they don't take insurance, forget it. I'm glad you told me about that. I should have known it sounded too new agey not to be expensive. I'll take the traits that stood out to me with these life coaches, and look for them in therapists that DO accept insurance.
-T
Posted by TexasChic on January 19, 2008, at 17:10:48
In reply to Re: I know what I need to do, posted by Dinah on January 19, 2008, at 10:36:09
Okay, I've covered work, relationships, and psychology. Anyone want to talk meds or politics? I could just see Dr. Bob trying to figure out where to redirect this thread! ;-)
I'm kidding of course. I suppose I should branch out and look at the other boards sometimes. But that would involve the ever dreaded subject of CHANGE!
Oh well, (Sigh) I GUESS I can give it a try.
-T
Posted by texaschic on January 22, 2008, at 14:37:46
In reply to Re: Interview with Marketing Dept on Tuesday! » Kath, posted by Phillipa on January 18, 2008, at 20:23:54
Keep your fingers crossed.
-T
Posted by Dinah on January 22, 2008, at 16:45:58
In reply to The interview went GREAT!, posted by texaschic on January 22, 2008, at 14:37:46
Although I'm not at all surprised. :)
Posted by TexasChic on January 22, 2008, at 18:19:17
In reply to That's wonderful!, posted by Dinah on January 22, 2008, at 16:45:58
Thanks! It seemed as if I was a perfect fit. They acted pleasantly surprised when I understood and was able to respond to all their questions. And there's so much opportunity to advance there! I so hope I get it! But if not, I will continue to try. I know I'll eventually get there as long as I don't give up.
-T
Posted by Kath on January 22, 2008, at 20:37:45
In reply to The interview went GREAT!, posted by texaschic on January 22, 2008, at 14:37:46
Fingers, eyes, toes....what else can I cross?
Best of luck TC,
hugs, Kath
Posted by TexasChic on January 23, 2008, at 17:48:36
In reply to Re: The interview went GREAT! » texaschic, posted by Kath on January 22, 2008, at 20:37:45
Thanks! I'm still waiting. I felt like I was going crazy today! Its almost worse because the interview went so well, because now I have to keep reminding myself it may not happen. If that's the case I will keep trying, there's no doubt about that, but this one just seems so perfect! And it would be such a relief to get out of my current job where they work me half to death!
-T
Posted by Kath on January 23, 2008, at 17:58:35
In reply to Re: The interview went GREAT! » Kath, posted by TexasChic on January 23, 2008, at 17:48:36
Do you have any idea how long it might be before you know?
Hope your current boss is treating you okay.
hugs, Kath
Posted by texaschic on January 25, 2008, at 15:21:18
In reply to Re: The interview went GREAT! » TexasChic, posted by Kath on January 23, 2008, at 17:58:35
I almost wish I hadn't even tried. Now I know the job I wish I had, which makes all I put up with in my current one seem even worse! I'm sitting here at work crying and I'm afraid my boss will see and want to know what's wrong. I've got to get it together.
The funny thing is they recommended me for the other position, which is the other one I interviewed for and didn't get. Its like I'm close, but keep getting beat by someone else.
Well, there is another department that I would like to work in, there just haven't been any postings. I just wish I hadn't had this comparison that made me realize my current job sucks so bad.
Anyway, I'll talk more later. I'll be okay, I'm just really disappointed at the moment.
-T
Posted by TexasChic on January 25, 2008, at 17:45:47
In reply to I didn't get it., posted by texaschic on January 25, 2008, at 15:21:18
It turns out the other job they recommended I apply for isn't the same one I interviewed for a few months back. Its just very similar and involves a lot of the same people. So I talked to my boss (I made a big thing about them recommending me so she wouldn't think I was applying for the next available thing) and applied for it. So we'll see what happens!
-T
Posted by Phillipa on January 25, 2008, at 20:36:11
In reply to Better news, posted by TexasChic on January 25, 2008, at 17:45:47
T that's great!!!!! Phillipa
Posted by Kath on January 28, 2008, at 18:57:52
In reply to Better news, posted by TexasChic on January 25, 2008, at 17:45:47
That's good - let us know what happens.
:-) Kath
Posted by TexasChic on January 29, 2008, at 18:06:44
In reply to Re: Better news » TexasChic, posted by Kath on January 28, 2008, at 18:57:52
God she's driving me crazy! She's just so rude and condescending. I wanted to smack her today. And I'm a pacifist!
Just needed to vent about that.
-T
Posted by ClearSkies on January 29, 2008, at 19:07:18
In reply to !@#$% My supervisor is such a you know what!, posted by TexasChic on January 29, 2008, at 18:06:44
> God she's driving me crazy! She's just so rude and condescending. I wanted to smack her today. And I'm a pacifist!
>
> Just needed to vent about that.
>
> -TI think this is the perfect forum to do just that! (And I'm not in the least surprised, btw.) From what you've said about her thus far, she's not the best boss on the block....
there is something to be said for being unemployed (?) Did I really just say that??
CS
Posted by Kath on January 29, 2008, at 19:38:15
In reply to Re: !@#$% My supervisor is such a you know what! » TexasChic, posted by ClearSkies on January 29, 2008, at 19:07:18
> there is something to be said for being unemployed (?) Did I really just say that??
>
> CS
LOL - yup you did!!TC - WHAT a pain....I do hope you get a different position.
xoxo kath
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